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Dear Man Technique Helps To Communicate

 




Thee are times when we are unable to say ‘no’ to any person. Rather at times, it is difficult for us to give feedback too! As a consequence, this struggle while communicating our needs, hamper us in many ways. This constant fear of expressing, hamper our mental health, personal and professional life.

And if you think you are caught in this turmoil. Then you must apply a conversational technique called DEAR MAN. DEAR Man skills are a great medium to strike communication. It helps in expressing our wants, dislikes while maintaining a healthy relationship.

In This Article  hide 
DEAR MAN Technique
1. ‘D’ stands for describe
2. ‘E’ stands for express
3. ‘A’ stands for assert
4. ‘R’ stands for reinforce
5. ‘M’ stands for Mindful
6. ‘A’ stands for appear/act confident
7. ‘N’ stands for negotiating
Closing thoughts

1. ‘D’ stands for describe

This the first step to convey your thoughts concisely. While doing so, do not include any assumptions and complicate. Also, do not drift away from the main problem. Instead, focus and describe to the other person what you want. While doing so, don’t leave the conversation with too many questions. Be clear while playing with words.

2. ‘E’ stands for express

It is very important to express yourself in an upright manner. Shyness has many adverse effects. Instead, a study highlighted that shyness can lead to loneliness and social anxiety. So, express yourself without any fear.

Strike an effective communication with the facial expression, gesture, tone of voice that highlight your request. And while doing all this, maintain a balance between your expressiveness. Don’t become over-expressive spoiling the happy medium. Remember to control your emotions in the best possible way.

3. ‘A’ stands for assert

Now that your position is clear, then start emphasizing on your needs. This is the time to gain self-confidence by honoring yourself with a solution. For example: if you’re unhappy with the promotion at the workplace. Then speak to your head and convey your position.

Tell them about your discontent and what you wish to have. The same applies to your family and friends too. If you are unwilling to go for a vacation, then assert by saying ‘no’ clearly.

4. ‘R’ stands for reinforce

Now that you have made the assertion. Then it’s time to explain the person about the consequences of your decision. Make them understand how your decision will benefit them as well as you.

Explain in a way that they will respond to your request in a positive manner. And once they agree and comply with your requests, then offer them rewards. For example, you may say ‘thank you’ or bake a cake for your loved ones.

5. ‘M’ stands for Mindful

A lot of times, when things turn ugly, we tend to lose focus. Several times, we even leave the conversation between. But while practicing this DBT skills, you must focus on your goal. While communicating, there will be a volley of questions and distractions.

Moreover, there will be personal attacks too. But it is important to hold your ground and ignore attacks. Do not deviate, unless you find a solution to the issue. If the other person is taking the conversation elsewhere then it is your job to bring him/her back to the topic.

6. ‘A’ stands for appear/act confident

Many of us experience stammering, sweating while taking decisions in difficult situations. But it is important to appear confident. Maintain eye contact and easily convey your decision.

Also, maintain a positive body language and confident tone of voice to convey your stance. Imagine yourself being competent for the position you are asking for. When you start taking yourself seriously, others will follow the practice.

7. ‘N’ stands for negotiating

There are times when things do not fall in place. Or your ideal solution is difficult to achieve. That’s when you need to find a midway without compromising your principles. And for this, you must negotiate by listening to what the other person has to say. The whole aim of interpersonal effectiveness is to not dictate but to embrace other’s views.

Closing thoughts

It takes a lot of practice for taking a stand for yourself while respecting the views of the others. But it is important to read your mind and be kind to yourself. Also, with DEAR MAN skill, you will get what you yearn for and preserve your relationships.

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